Really loved this piece. “Confidence is built, not thought” is something I should tape up on my wall. I often think about the fact that you build confidence just by DOING the hard things until they don’t scare you anymore. All the way from complimenting a stranger to performing on a stage, sometimes you just have to have the evidence base to know you can do things outside your own brain. Thanks for sharing your ponderings, and making me ponder too x
"“I think you guys might be thinking about yourselves too much,” it changed my life. I’m often facetious about this kind of thing, prone to exaggerating for dramatic effect. But this, really and truly, did shift something in my brain."
I felt this on a cellular level. It is so detrimental to the self and in turn, to community, to be so self obsessed even if it's masked as self-love/self betterment etc whatever the fuck you wanna call it. And once you become aware of it in yourself, you become aware of it in others and it is a great repellent. Anyway ranting atp but great piece and so true.
absolutely loved this!! the quote was such a (good) slap in the face for me too. and the whole passage about community was so spot on! I also remind myself that people were once only able to see their reflections in the water - and that brings me back down on earth. we weren’t meant to look at ourselves, we were meant to look at others, outwards!
I love this so much. One, because I have also rewatched Girls at least four times and two, the whole idea of living in your own head is so resonant. It’s so easy to hyper fixate on understanding and bettering yourself and become completely disconnected from the outside world. Your list of things you do to get back into it is super helpful <3
I also loved Jemima's advice! So concise and helpful. As someone who has gone through depression in my 20s and found a way out, you also have to be ready to receive this kind of advice... I'm not sure how many people are ready for it, though, sadly. (I'm referrring to people/women of all ages, too!) We are living through a time where self-obsession is enabled, even encouraged, by so many aspects of modern life.
Oh I loved your post! I feel like when we are in community and service to others we often feel the best about ourselves. Not in rumination and comparison which just perpetuates this cycle of self absorption 💗
Really loved this piece. “Confidence is built, not thought” is something I should tape up on my wall. I often think about the fact that you build confidence just by DOING the hard things until they don’t scare you anymore. All the way from complimenting a stranger to performing on a stage, sometimes you just have to have the evidence base to know you can do things outside your own brain. Thanks for sharing your ponderings, and making me ponder too x
❤️❤️
"“I think you guys might be thinking about yourselves too much,” it changed my life. I’m often facetious about this kind of thing, prone to exaggerating for dramatic effect. But this, really and truly, did shift something in my brain."
I felt this on a cellular level. It is so detrimental to the self and in turn, to community, to be so self obsessed even if it's masked as self-love/self betterment etc whatever the fuck you wanna call it. And once you become aware of it in yourself, you become aware of it in others and it is a great repellent. Anyway ranting atp but great piece and so true.
Yes!! So much of ‘self improvement’ is actually making us worse lol
absolutely loved this!! the quote was such a (good) slap in the face for me too. and the whole passage about community was so spot on! I also remind myself that people were once only able to see their reflections in the water - and that brings me back down on earth. we weren’t meant to look at ourselves, we were meant to look at others, outwards!
I always think about the fact we were never a) meant to see our faces this much and b) see more than a couple hundred faces in our entire lifetime
Everything about this is spot-on – my biggest mental health revelation has been to actually do things instead of just thinking about doing things.
I love this so much. One, because I have also rewatched Girls at least four times and two, the whole idea of living in your own head is so resonant. It’s so easy to hyper fixate on understanding and bettering yourself and become completely disconnected from the outside world. Your list of things you do to get back into it is super helpful <3
This just feels like home. Like you looked inside my brain and wrote down my inner most thoughts and feelings.
Ah that’s so lovely to hear. Appreciate you.
Ooooh I love the bits about how you don’t build confidence by thinking about it, so true
You are so wise and wonderful! I love Vicky's feature too
Loved this. And even though I am a few years older than you, I can relate. I just wrote my first essay about similar themes.
"I build confidence by doing, not by endlessly dissecting whether I have it." YES YES YES!
Great post!
I also loved Jemima's advice! So concise and helpful. As someone who has gone through depression in my 20s and found a way out, you also have to be ready to receive this kind of advice... I'm not sure how many people are ready for it, though, sadly. (I'm referrring to people/women of all ages, too!) We are living through a time where self-obsession is enabled, even encouraged, by so many aspects of modern life.
Are you an enneagram 4? I think being so internally focused can be a tendencies of 4s! (Speaking as one myself)
Loved this so much!!!
Oh I loved your post! I feel like when we are in community and service to others we often feel the best about ourselves. Not in rumination and comparison which just perpetuates this cycle of self absorption 💗