It's Not That Bad #11: Love Island Just Lowered Its Own Misogyny Bar

Double Standards, Gaslighting & Coercive Control

Last night’s episode of Love Island was not entertaining. I found myself pacing the room, unable to look fully as we watched deep-rooted misogyny play out in 4k. You know it’s bad when Adam Collard looks like one of the most respectful men in a room.

We have a misogyny problem in the UK, one that has created a crisis of male violence and systemic sexism in almost every area of life: an investigation by UN Women UK found that 97% of women surveyed have been sexually harassed. Almost one in three women aged 16-59 will experience domestic abuse in her lifetime. Two women a week are killed by a current or former partner in England and Wales alone. In 2021, the United Kingdom ranked 23rd on the global gender gap index, placing it behind other European countries such as France, Germany, and Ireland. There are so many stats to prove this - because the testimonies of women rarely are enough - and even then, I’m sure I’ll still have people commenting ‘not all men’ after posting this. Misogyny is so rich that misogynists will deny misogyny by being actively misogynistic.

And this system is an ecosystem, one that builds and thrives and grows. So, when we watch men slut shame, gaslight and try to control women on the country’s most popular reality TV show it sends red signals: it tells the young audience watching that this behaviour is normal. That lads will be lads. That misogynistic and toxic behaviour is part and parcel when it comes to love. The saddest part of watching the male contestants on Love Island is that their behaviour isn’t rare. Dating is a scary gamble, and one that I lost many times - I don’t need to explain this to women who have dated men, you’ll get it. You’re constantly tossing up your safety when meeting a new man: are they going to be nice and kind? or are they going to be coercive or anti-women or misogynistic? Are we going to get eight weeks in, and their true colours will show?