It's Not That Bad #15: Hi, I’m the problem, it’s me

Things I can’t bring myself to stop doing

We’re all so obsessed with self-improvement that leisure and fun have been turned into productivity hacks on TikTok - simply walking to your destination is now a Hot Girl Walk, drinking water a competition with a special-bottle to boot, capitalism so entrenched that its practices have become something to romanticise.

I spend hours watching other people on the internet organise their kitchens with containers worth hundreds that they list on their Amazon Storefront. I save videos of women who get up at 4AM so they can work a 12-hour-day and still work out and eat healthy and trade NFTs. I’ve legitimately felt like a failure because I don’t have multiple shapes of ice in my freezer. I have a Trello board for my social life. I have been convinced to drink alkaline water.

And you know what?

I’m sick of self-improvement. I’m at my limit with trying to be better.

So, I thought I’d make a little list of 3 things I do that are neutrally bad (AKA not going to kill me or harm anyone, but that would never be classed as ‘good’ or ‘productive’). These things do not contribute to my higher self, and yet, I’m going to continue to do them. I’m doubling down on my bad habits.

1. Drinking Diet Coke. A chilled can of DC at 3PM everyday is life’s only consistency. It is always crisp and refreshing. It always hits the spot. I literally could not care less about what it’s made from. Diet Coke lovers are a special breed, we are hardy and scrappy, and I’m very happy to be in that club.

2. Cotton buds (or if you’re American, Q-tips). There is truly no better feeling than sticking a cotton bud down your ear. If you disagree, you’re lying or haven’t truly lived. I know they’re bad for me. Recently a TikTok video told me I have the hearing of a 64 year-old.  And yet, I cannot stop. Will not stop.

3. Financial scams: I’ve not saved a single penny this year. What are these hackers gonna do? Steal the £10 of my overdraft left? Sure. Knock yourself out.

In this vein, I wrote a poem on loving the messiness of life - to read it and get the full newsletter experience, you’ll need to subscribe for £3.50 a month.